I want so badly to write down how I feel.. but every time I try to I just end up erasing it. I guess I just feel silly for wanting to write everything down for people to maybe see and because it really isn't all that bad. Seriously, I have a great life and I shouldn't have any reason to complain, but somehow I still run across things that I want to complain about.
I just am so unmotivated. and it makes me feel so worthless. I don't want to do anything, if I could I would sit in my room all day and just forget everything and everyone else.
school is overwhelming, work is shitty, home life is eh.
I should be doing homework
I should have cleaned my room
I should have worked out and ate right
I shouldn't have spent any money today
I should be making more money
I don't know. my mind is just elsewhere and I can't seem to get back on track. I don't exactly know how to fix it..
I just feel like I'm not where I should be or something.
meh. yaaaaay for emo post.
December 9, 2011
May 28, 2011
long overdue
so much has happened in just a short amount of time.. pictures for now, posts later :)
↓super gluing eggs to my hands..
oh and introducing, Ruthy.
↓super gluing eggs to my hands..
oh and introducing, Ruthy.
March 9, 2011
puppy
last night we got our new puppy :)
it's a girl and she's a lab/pit mix. I wasn't too enthralled with the fact that she is a girl, but how the heck could I say no to that face. she's too damn cute.
I guess the people who had her before us kept all of them outside, so she's been staying outside most of the time. I finally stole her and put her on my bed which is where she is passed out right now. I'm hoping she warms up soon so we can come up with a name for her.
she's stinky haha worst puppy farts I've ever encountered.
but like I said, her cuteness makes up for everything. she's already almost as big as Buddha and she's only 3 months, forget getting a new car, I'm just going to ride her around. She's got a huge gut too it's hilarious.
name choices so far, at least my choices:
Gigantor, Fatty Mc Fat Fat, The Cuteness. haha I have no idea what to name her. we'll have to see
it's a girl and she's a lab/pit mix. I wasn't too enthralled with the fact that she is a girl, but how the heck could I say no to that face. she's too damn cute.
I guess the people who had her before us kept all of them outside, so she's been staying outside most of the time. I finally stole her and put her on my bed which is where she is passed out right now. I'm hoping she warms up soon so we can come up with a name for her.
she's stinky haha worst puppy farts I've ever encountered.
but like I said, her cuteness makes up for everything. she's already almost as big as Buddha and she's only 3 months, forget getting a new car, I'm just going to ride her around. She's got a huge gut too it's hilarious.
name choices so far, at least my choices:
Gigantor, Fatty Mc Fat Fat, The Cuteness. haha I have no idea what to name her. we'll have to see
March 6, 2011
The Dude
so I've been trying to save The Dude for sometime.. oh, and for those who don't know the Dude is my car :p I was lucky enough to just get a car handed to me, which was unexpected. but the car is old, and I'm not entirely sure he's worth saving anymore. I've already put almost 2,000 into him and he's still having trouble. actually having more trouble than he did when I first came to be the owner..
anyways, about two nights ago, I kind of just decided that it was time to change something because I am really restricted with how much I can push the distances he can make and because it seems like every little thing is some huge process. so today my dad and I went to a few dealerships and looked at cars and tried to figure out if I could even get financed. after a few places we landed on a Honda Civic. which I was originally contemplating before the Camaro landed in my lap. we ran my credit and what not and it seems pretty final already that I'm going to get approved and that I will be giving my Camaro up for a newer Honda.
all in all I find it kind of funny how torn I am between this decision, after all it is just a car. but I look back and I've kinda grown up in it since it was my dads before. and for whatever reason I get attached to inanimate objects.
tonight I drove my last circle around Simi in my Camaro to get it outta my system and I think that getting this newer car will be so much less of a headache, with at least with the reliability aspect, and it will be less of a headache for my dad, Jose, and Jose's dad too.
Time to be responsible Arie haha. it hit me the other day that my 21st birthday is 521 days
( hahah) away andddd that is completely nuts to me! I was just 16! what happened? :p I know that's a little far, but it seems so close compared to how far it seemed before. Getting a new car is just one of the many responsibilities that are bound to come my way in the next 2-3 years, with finishing school and what not. its funny how things are not how I ever imagined them to be, and I'm actually ok with that.
on a random side note, we might be getting a puppy. We talked to Carol and came to the conclusion that Angus has been there for so long that he is most comfortable there, and that he should remain there but still be "our" dog. I'm not as upset about that as I thought I would be.
maybe because he's been there and he's healthy and happy.
I think that this is long enough for now, it's been a while since I've posted anything. I'll try to catch up. but for now, keep your fingers crossed that everything goes well with the car :)
anyways, about two nights ago, I kind of just decided that it was time to change something because I am really restricted with how much I can push the distances he can make and because it seems like every little thing is some huge process. so today my dad and I went to a few dealerships and looked at cars and tried to figure out if I could even get financed. after a few places we landed on a Honda Civic. which I was originally contemplating before the Camaro landed in my lap. we ran my credit and what not and it seems pretty final already that I'm going to get approved and that I will be giving my Camaro up for a newer Honda.
all in all I find it kind of funny how torn I am between this decision, after all it is just a car. but I look back and I've kinda grown up in it since it was my dads before. and for whatever reason I get attached to inanimate objects.
tonight I drove my last circle around Simi in my Camaro to get it outta my system and I think that getting this newer car will be so much less of a headache, with at least with the reliability aspect, and it will be less of a headache for my dad, Jose, and Jose's dad too.
Time to be responsible Arie haha. it hit me the other day that my 21st birthday is 521 days
( hahah) away andddd that is completely nuts to me! I was just 16! what happened? :p I know that's a little far, but it seems so close compared to how far it seemed before. Getting a new car is just one of the many responsibilities that are bound to come my way in the next 2-3 years, with finishing school and what not. its funny how things are not how I ever imagined them to be, and I'm actually ok with that.
on a random side note, we might be getting a puppy. We talked to Carol and came to the conclusion that Angus has been there for so long that he is most comfortable there, and that he should remain there but still be "our" dog. I'm not as upset about that as I thought I would be.
maybe because he's been there and he's healthy and happy.
I think that this is long enough for now, it's been a while since I've posted anything. I'll try to catch up. but for now, keep your fingers crossed that everything goes well with the car :)
February 7, 2011
familiarity breeds contempt
Hello Metallica, midnight pomegranate lotion, and warm weather.. if I was ever trying to forget before, this is crashing and burning.
reminds me of who I was
it was bound to happen once cleaning my room brought on the discovery of baby ipod and my old lotion I would wear everyday. All I need now is some Very Sexy by Victoria's Secret and big t-shirts and I'll be my familiar old self.
call me lame, but it's freaking insane how little things like smell and music bring back so many different memories just because they were lingering when things were happening. it completely changes feelings and moods.
now all I need is a trip to Venice beach and an afternoon of walking around til it's dark.
reminds me of who I was
it was bound to happen once cleaning my room brought on the discovery of baby ipod and my old lotion I would wear everyday. All I need now is some Very Sexy by Victoria's Secret and big t-shirts and I'll be my familiar old self.
call me lame, but it's freaking insane how little things like smell and music bring back so many different memories just because they were lingering when things were happening. it completely changes feelings and moods.
now all I need is a trip to Venice beach and an afternoon of walking around til it's dark.
January 22, 2011
nude model o.O
soooo today we are going to be drawing a nude model in my figure drawing class annnnd I'm nervous becuase I'm freaking immature for one thing, and for another I'm not entirely sure what to expect. it's not like I've never seen anyone naked before, but my teacher said there are sometimes older models... and by older he means in like their sixties. I'm sorry if I don't wanna see someone who could be my grandfather bending over in front of me for me to draw.. it's just awkward haha. noooo, in all reality I'm sure on this occasion I can actually act my age, only because if I were naked in front of a class I wouldn't want people to be smirking or anything.. I'll just need to think of serious matters.. dead puppies, dead puppies. :p and it's art, if they were in bikinis or a speedo it would completely lose its meaning and beauty. I've also decided that just in case the models get to see our drawings I will be generous with distributing voluptuousness, if you know what I'm saying... hahah. where do they find these people anyways? nude beaches? strip clubs? I wonder what it pays to sit there like that. I wouldn't have the balls to sit up there like that with people looking at my imperfections and what not. well anywayssss I'm off to school. eee.
January 5, 2011
the lameo I've become
well, in reality it isn't so lame. I actually have direction and I'm working towards different things. It's just a little overwhelming to look at my schedule and realize that it's all dedicated to school and Ralph's. Christmas break went by too quickly, I didn't even have enough time to get out of the responsible fashion.
on a side note, I've been thinking about a lot of random shit, so here it is:
and in regards to the first bullet, Kryssie needed some proof. ahahaha
on a side note, I've been thinking about a lot of random shit, so here it is:
- I've decided that Dwayne "The Rock" Johnson has no eyelids.
- Listening to Incubus on shuffle/repeat might have been the best choice I've made in a while, along with that I am reclaiming Brandon Boyd as my husband.
- Brown eyeliner has overcome black eyeliner
- If Jose and I ever break up, I will continue to wear fighting brands because it makes me feel tough.. even though most people have no idea what they are. haha
- I've successfully lost all of my bobby pins and hair ties.
- I need abs
- It'd be nice if my eyebrows would just stay maintained by themselves.
- I want orange nail polish
- I've drunken a 24 pack of water in less than a week
- I miss my car
- what the hell am I supposed to put in a purse.
- how do you be in two places at once?
- you're only convincing yourself that you're happy
- People should just pay me
- I want an exclusive membership to costco :p so I can buy things in bulk
- I wish I could yell at some customers without getting fired
- volcom makes me happy
- Mark Wahlberg and GSP are babes.
- Everyone's the same
- telling people how gay they are when they come over to my house has become a hobby. along with yelling at them for smoking in my house.
- cleaning my room shouldn't still be a mission
- I own a snuggie.. ahaha
- what is laundry without good smelling dryer sheets?
- My boyfriend got the courage to ask me to trade him xboxs and I accidentally pretended like I was asleep. I should probably just trade him, I only play like 5 games.
- I can still pass for 16.
- Crickets are the devil
- and I really just want a double double.
and in regards to the first bullet, Kryssie needed some proof. ahahaha
January 4, 2011
easy on the eyes
some of my favorite pictures from the trip, a little delayed, but still good none the less :)
I'm entirely too lazy to organize them, so they're pretty all over the place.
anyways! enjoy :)
The Black sand beach, completely amazing. the sand sparkled like there were diamonds between each grain of sand where the sun hit, like I have mentioned before, pictures don't do the job-- er, camera phone pictures.
The sunset on the way back from the Road to Hana
I love this picture, it's currently my phone background. :) very tropical I thought. makes me wish I was on the beach now.
Probably favorite picture I took, this was our view from our condo. you don't see things like this in California, not with all of the smog and yuck around.
hahahah. my father. while at the Luau it started pouring so they handed out emergency ponchos anddddd my dad didn't want to mess up his "do". this picture makes me happy.
Dara and I :)
meh, flower haha
Haleakala Crater. above all of the clouds. just thinking about it I get cold.
of course I had to include the minivan.
The view from our Lanai. :)
Oh and this picture goes along with that post that I had posted a while ago with important things and what not, how could I forget Angus!
Angy Pangy best puppy ever! :)
I'm entirely too lazy to organize them, so they're pretty all over the place.
anyways! enjoy :)
The Seven Sacred Pools!
The Black sand beach, completely amazing. the sand sparkled like there were diamonds between each grain of sand where the sun hit, like I have mentioned before, pictures don't do the job-- er, camera phone pictures.
The sunset on the way back from the Road to Hana
I love this picture, it's currently my phone background. :) very tropical I thought. makes me wish I was on the beach now.
Probably favorite picture I took, this was our view from our condo. you don't see things like this in California, not with all of the smog and yuck around.
hahahah. my father. while at the Luau it started pouring so they handed out emergency ponchos anddddd my dad didn't want to mess up his "do". this picture makes me happy.
Dara and I :)
meh, flower haha
Haleakala Crater. above all of the clouds. just thinking about it I get cold.
of course I had to include the minivan.
The view from our Lanai. :)
Oh and this picture goes along with that post that I had posted a while ago with important things and what not, how could I forget Angus!
Angy Pangy best puppy ever! :)
January 1, 2011
goodbye 2010 hello 2011
first and foremost, HAPPY NEW YEAR!
I know it's lame to be on here right now and not out still partying, but Ralph's gave me the bright and early 7am shift. I just needed to post this before anything changes because right now, in this moment I am happy. (haha reminds me of incubus :P)
but anyways, I spent my New Years with Jose, and at first things got pretty hectic. I'll spare the details since everything is how it should be now.
I have never had such a crazy time with a new year in my life. his families tradition is to throw 13 pennies over your shoulder while running down the street with luggage while eating 13 grapes and making wishes on each!
I was cracking up the whole time, trying to do all at once was so challenging. I think I might have even made the same wish twice hahaha. I will never forget tonight. truly amazing. I think I just fell for Jose all over again. as for resolutions, I shall have to get back to you on that. Not that I'll stick to them anyways but hey coming up with them is still amusing. :p
I know it's lame to be on here right now and not out still partying, but Ralph's gave me the bright and early 7am shift. I just needed to post this before anything changes because right now, in this moment I am happy. (haha reminds me of incubus :P)
but anyways, I spent my New Years with Jose, and at first things got pretty hectic. I'll spare the details since everything is how it should be now.
I have never had such a crazy time with a new year in my life. his families tradition is to throw 13 pennies over your shoulder while running down the street with luggage while eating 13 grapes and making wishes on each!
I was cracking up the whole time, trying to do all at once was so challenging. I think I might have even made the same wish twice hahaha. I will never forget tonight. truly amazing. I think I just fell for Jose all over again. as for resolutions, I shall have to get back to you on that. Not that I'll stick to them anyways but hey coming up with them is still amusing. :p
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